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January 03, 2010



Ah Wendy, I am right there with you. No matter what I do (or don't do), the *holidays* get me down. I did nothing this year. My decorations did not see the light of day. I went to my daughters' (they live together) house for xmas. Nothing was required of me. But still...



donna lee

I love the holidays. I think it's because I gave up all the should-do's and have-to's. I do what I want to do and try to find some joy in that. So, far, it's working.

I wish you and your family a Happy New Year. And go ahead and hit Play. I'm ready (because I have to)


Happy New Year!! At least 11 months until that time again :)

Alice in Richmong

I love reading blogs about humbugginess! Happy New Year!


Go ahead Wendy and prepare to make changes for next Christmas. Forget the "should dos" and do what's meaningful for you and your family. Your friends and family will still love you. I never would have made these changes had we not been required to move but in hindsight I should have made these changes years ago. Happy New Year!


I made donuts and they weren't greasy, so it was a good holiday. I don't ask for a lot, and expect even less. Maybe that's the secret. Happy Twenty-ten.


You are so right on--Thanksgiving through Christmas is such a chore! It takes everything I've got to be cheerful for my boys. Ugh. I so dislike the colors too! Yuk! I'm so thankful January is here too. Cheers, sister!


You are so right! Once one has lived a reasonably long life (I'm in my early 60s), one feels a lot of sadness over the holidays because of people and perhaps even dreams lost. Let's get it over with, I say, then move on to a new year. All the best to you for 2010!


May 2010 be an excellent year for you.

and for me too! ;)


Though I greatly enjoy Christmas, I find that last photo so off-putting that I can't imagine having to deal with such scenes (and having to the cooking for them) would make me feel grumpy about the holidays. I also imagine that I'll be making tomorrow a meatless monday. Happy New Year!


I,m so happy it is january. I even think it is more light now than for only 10 days ago. Happy New Year!

Harpa J

Happy New Year!
The "I-have-to-do's" and the "I-should-do's" I am far to familiar with those...


It's comforting to know I'm not the only one who feels the way you do about the holidays. Every year I dread them. Did I buy the right gifts and enough of them? Why am I not happy the way I "should" be? When will this damn season be over?!! January is the best month of the year. No one expects anything of you. If there is anything scheduled that you feel you "should" attend, in the Midwest anyway there's a big chance it will be canceled because of bad weather. You can snuggle inside and knit or read. It's great!


you'd run out of spit...that is the best! happy and healthy new year to you and yours i am also so glad it is finally here and we can dispense with the hating ourselves for hating the holidays feeling!


After two weeks of my family, husband's family, friends, etc. we are taking some time for ourselves and heading to Maui. Too bad we had to take so much time off work to fit in all the family and holiday hoopla.
Best wishes for 2010.


Happy New Year Wendy.
This year for the first time in years I truly enjoyed the holidays. For the first time they were almost entirely on my terms but for the benefit of my 3 year old grandchildren.
No more Christmas cards, if I didn't feel like wrapping, the packages went into gift bags, I baked only a few things we all love (myself included), and I cooked chili for Christmas Eve because that's what we wanted. Oh yeah, and Christmas Day was a buffet. Yes we women(I even had kitchen help for the first time) did the cooking but we walked out and guess who did the clean up? I finally learned to say -- HEY, I'm not Super Woman. Why did it take me so long to figure all this out?

gina L.

I don't like that those people come each year and invade your world this way! I really know what you mean about Christmas and the Holidays. There is so much build up and expectations are high. Much to do and putting energy into things that are not what is really important. Sometimes situations or recall of a season brings emotion from the past. Even when everything is happy and going well at that particular moment. Past hurts and suffering is quickly recalled. I definitely am melancholy during the holidays. What I try to tell myself is that it is just my mind trying to go back to old unnecessary suffering and that I don't need to listen to it or go there. I am getting better and better at identifying it and I try to redirect myself to the things that I am grateful for or what is good in my life. It's not always easy but I know that it is the key to me finding happiness. Actually this is my goal for 2010... I want to find joy and not replay the old tapes in my head. It's all suffering that I allow myself to dwell in. Meditation helps. Believe me it will be hard work! This might sound crazy but I wanted to share this with you....
Here's to a wonderful 2010 for both of us!!!!


"I suppose I can feel comfort in the fact that I'm not the kind of cook who dreams of spitting in someone else's food, because if I were that kind of cook, I'd run out of spit. Or, I'd have to drink a lot of extra water to keep up with all the spitting. And crying. . . . "

Paragraphs like that are why I keep coming back to read your blog--genuine, honest, complicated, true. Almost all your posts make me laugh out loud--and the best of them make me both laugh and cry.

Best wishes to you and yours for the New Year.


dawn s

I, like many, seem to overwhelm myself at the holidays. I want it to be special for my 4 kids because they have only one childhood and I need to create the best memories I can. But, I scaled way back this year and the world did not come to an end. I think when I have grandchildren, I will be able to live my more creative dreams of what I would like to do for the holidays. In the meanwhile, I try to cover the basics and make sure I teach the kids the reason for the season.
Don't know what to say about the in-laws. MY family was actually the problem this year for me. But, I feel full of hope for the new year for myself and others. I hope you do, too. Maybe, you should just cook what you want and they can either eat it or go out. BTW, Biotene mouthwash is awesome! It is not just for dry mouth as it has xylitol and all sorts of healthy stuff in it. My dentists have made me a total convert.


I am totally with you, sister! Somehow the holidays have changed from "I can't wait!" to "Oh God, make it stop!" And it starts as soon as the Halloween items disappear from the store shelves. Can't we at least wait until Thanksgiving before we hear all that Christmas music?

I told my mom this year that I think after 50 or so (increasingly commercialized and more meaningless every year) Christmas holidays, I'm just kinda done...


Usually I like the holidays, but this was one to change all that. My sister's family gave us stomach flu -- three of four of us got it -- so we lost the entire week after Christmas. Stomach flu -- the gift that keeps on giving.


I'm not one to comment much, but I'm totally with you on this. It's a lot of pressure in a world where there's too much already. I've always said I'd like to be a man at Christmas time. They throw a few lights up outside (in my case, very few) and sit back and enjoy all of the hard work and weeks of preparation that we do to make it perfect. Ok. Now I'M complaining!!


New Year's Day is my favorite holiday, I don't bake/cook a thing, just a relaxing day of planning and list making and anticipation.

Tday and Xmas are just too much work anymore (especially as the only able bodied female in a very old family)


Is there any chance you could disappear to some pork-free zone for a few weeks every December? Maybe it's just a dream, but it's a nice one, right?
It's all well and good to say things like, "people can only make you feel bad if you let them," and "just relax," but that kind of talk has never worked for me. Some things just do hurt and some things are so hard to let go of that it's its own form of hard work. Sucks, but it's true. Here's where I say something cheesy: your feelings are valid, so go ahead and feel them. I think having a good cry, and even a good private hissy fit if that's what you want, can be good for the soul. Stuffing it all down just leads to ulcers.

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