The Cove of Pleasure

Things start feeling a bit surreal when you have an upstairs office all gussied up with new IKEA furniture, a couple of swatch pillows, a real orchid plant and a giant portable air conditioner--the kind not even a giant gilded yeti wearing princess panties could camoflauge--yet you'd rather be downstairs watching Beverly Hills 90210 while "working" instead.

It's not that I don't like my new office. I just want to watch Beverly Hills 90210 while I knit and write this post, and the TV upstairs doesn't have the Soap Channel.

Maybe I'm in denial. Or maybe I just have bad taste in television.

There's been a lot of interest in my new pattern, Sizzle, and I want to say thanks. I know that the silk blend I used is pricey, but if you can afford it, it makes such a great garment. There are things you can substitute, and I've had some inquires about subs, so here are a few ideas (and please leave a comment if you have ideas for subs, too):

Berroco Glace - Elann.com has it on sale for $3.48, only two colors are available but both are fabulously cool.
Jaeger Albany - It has been discontinued, I think, and it is on sale everywhere.
Karabella Zodiac - Just $6.00 a ball at kpixie.com and the colors are amazing.
Cascade Pima Silk - Go down a needle size to get the right gauge. Just note, this stuff doesn't have a ton of sheen, but it feels so nice against the skin.
Berroco Denim Silk - Also discontinued so you might be able to snag some cheap, cheap, cheap.
Plymouth Fantasy Naturale - This has a nice sheen, but you'd have to go down a needle size.

I think the key with this one is to make it with something that has a bit of drape and a bit of shine. Or dang it, knit it with anything that makes your heart go pitter pat.

Oh, BTW: Today I nearly expired when, working at Girlfriend's summer school, about five different moms turned their boys away when they showed interest in learning how to knit. I should know: I was sitting just outside in the puzzle and playhouse area where I was stationed. There was so much noise and chaos that I found myself squatting and shuddering in the corner, just outside the entrance to the cove of pleasure (knitting room) to find a little solace (as close to the cove of pleasure, I mean the "knitting room," as I could get without the head mistress giving me that "look").

Why can't the boys learn to knit?

I even witnessed one mom turn her son away from the cove of pleasure--and then when he asked about the sewing room as an alternative--I swear, I saw her eyeballs roll back and beads of sweat form under her nose so fast, my neck is still sore from the impact.

I tell you what: Girlfriend is more than welcome to scare away the garter snake that was sitting outside our front door today, or better, wind up that long orange electrical cord when I'm done with it.

Shoot, she can even mow the lawn when she's ready. Or wear fatigues, or study engineering or shave her head (when she's old enough).

Really now. Why can't the boys learn to knit? (I know how to lead when waltzing.)

Comments

[Kate]

At my lys, I recently eavesdropped on a woman and her 9-year-old son. He got really excited looking at all the yarn and said he just HAD to knit "a red sweater". He threw a fit until she got the yarn ("but MOOOMMM, I want ALPAAAACAA!!!"). Even though the whining was a little obnoxious, it was great to see a boy so interested in it AND a mother who supported his interest. Don't lose hope yet! :)

[Kate]

Oh yeah, my friend Thor also asked me to teach him how to knit. Picture this guy: 26 years old, 6'4", big and burly, former mountain guide, very masculine. He completely matches his name. He manages the ski lifts at a Colorado resort and has a lot of down time. He picked it up really quickly and knit hats while watching the lifts, much to the surprise of his coworkers. It is awesome! He's also studying to be a nurse and was raised by a stay-at-home-dad while his mother worked as a university professor. Talk about a shining example!

[Wendy]

The MOOMMM, I want ALPAAACAA!!! part would bug me because, let me tell ya, I'm 42 and I have just gotten to the Alpaca stage.

When I was his age, I'd be lucky to get that Aunt Lydia rug yarn for just about anything, including a pillow case pattern.

But times have changed, I figure.

[Wendy]

...Is Thor single? (Just asking)

[Erika]

On the up side, those mothers have hit upon the best way to GUARANTEE that their boys will, come hell or high water, learn how to knit when they hit the teen years.

[knitteriam]

I spend time waiting for my three children's activities to be completed and while I was at the Do Jang (Tae Kwon Do school) knitting one day, a young boy about 7 inquired and watched me while I chatted with his father. The next week I brought him needles and a ball of yarn and stood behind him as he learned to knit. The dad said that he never stood that still or focused EVER and he was always having problems in school. I shared with the dad about how knitting engages both sides of the brain, fine motor skill development, etc. I encouraged him to bring it back next week and we could work more on it. Do you know that dad never brought him back with the yarn to Tae Kwon Do class and even avoided me as we passed in the waiting area of the TKD school. It infuriated me that he wouldn't give his kid a chance. It's true that the pendulum has shifted and girls can do anything but boys are the ones with the unwritten rules these days.

[Kate]

I'm really involved in our local little league. There are two 10 year old best friends that have been playing in the league and watching their older siblings for years. One is a boy, one is a girl. The boy begged me to teach him to knit, the girl wants nothing to do with it. He is making himself a hat right now. Last week his 4 year old brother got a hold of his knitting and dropped a bunch of stitches. My little knitting pal figured out how to pick them up himself. Knitteriam is right. Somehow the tide has turned and girls can do anything but boys still have to do "manly" things only or there is something wrong with them. I don't get it.

[april]

that is so obnoxious. boys should be able to do whatever girls do. and vice versa. thoses mothers are so annoying.

[Elizabeth M.]

Both my sons have had knitting lessons. And spinning, too. They aren't what I would call naturals, but that's ok. I didn't really get into knitting until I was an adult, but the seeds were planted as a child.

It's shocking to find such sexism still practiced in this day and age.

My younger son (almost 5) loves The Littlest Pet Shop toys. These are marketed to girls, but there's no reason they couldn't have been marketed in a more gender-neutral way. I'm sure there are parents in the world who would be shocked to see my little guy putting his Happy Hampsters in the Whirl-Around Playground.

[Dawn]

I have two little boys (6yrs & 9yrs) that come in for private knitting lessons with me. Both their mom and dad encourage them. The youngest has made two hats for his little sister and a knitting bag for himself. If his mom doesn't watch he sneaks her knitting while she is out of the room and works on her projects.

[pivenfan]

What about Blue Sky Alpacas Alpaca & Silk? It's so yummy looking.

[Heather]

It's too bad those mothers wouldn't let their sons learn to knit. They are SO perpetuating stereotypes. I am teaching my 4 year old to knit, even though I think it's just a phase. He's surrounded by women who knit, and his biggest pleasure as we were working on his knitting last weekend was to tuck the yarn under his arm and go around the room showing everyone his work. I think he just wants to be part of the group, and I'm sure his "group" won't always be knitting women, but for now, especially in the summer when he's here so much more than during the school year, it is.

[Cathy]

I'm expecting a short person in September, and he's going to have the chance to do everything. I tend to do all the traditional "feminine" things, like spin, knit, crochet, embroider, etc. My husband tends to do the "masculine" things--wood work, mechanical things with the cars, electrical, plumbing, etc. But he's just as good a cook as I am, and he's actually a better housekeeper. And because of my interests, the short person will know things about heavy metal poisoning, Egyptian mumification, and criminal justice before he starts school, just like he'll know how to change the oil on the truck. ;)

[tense teacher]

Can't tell you how many well-meaning relatives remind me (and often) how my daughter "spends too much time" playing with cars and "boy things." Every year, they give her Barbies and other dolls for Christmas, and every year my Littleone throws them to the bottom of her toy box, never to be seen again.

Why are we still dealing with gender stereotypes in the 21st century?

[elizabeth]

I'm sure someone has already mentioned it, but in most of Europe *everyone* learns to knit starting at, like, five years old. It's supposed to be very good for controlling and/or preventing ADD and ADHD (though I really think diet plays a bigger role here, but that is a whole other tirade). Perhaps you should come prepared with copies of statistics in your purse as well as super-manly patterns.

Truth be told, I was the girl with the most Barbies, but I was also the girl with the most matchbox cars and a HUGE electric train set that my dad and I built and I turned out just fine. I applaud your philosophy with Girlfriend.

[Christine]

I'll bet those moms would froth at the mouth and be on a waiting list for years for the chance to get those boys into an exclusive Waldorf school...knitting (and weaving, and other handwork) is part of the cirriculum. The Waldorf school in my city starts all kids purling in Kindergarten. Heck, if I had to go back to Elementary school (while bypassing middle and high schol, thank you very much) I'd cheerfully go there!

[wmix]

I just saw this website today of what appears to be a really sexist man who is camping out on his roof ("on strike") until his wife gets their child out of their bed. I think denying men access to more stereotypically-female things warps them. And of course, being able to knit is a babe magnet for hetero men. I have taught my 64-year-old dad, my husband (it didn't stick) and will teach my son too when he is old enough, if he even shows an inkling of interest.

[anne]

The Yarn Boy Yarn Blog http://yarnboy.com/wp/index.php
has cute "boys knit" buttons for sale. They're cheap. I bought two and plan to buy 20 more and distribute them freely. Wendy, my blog has zero readership, but yours has tons, so that's why I'm mentioning it here.

[Gina L.]

Yah, boys knit! That mother has a terrible attitude. I know a young man that wrote his college essay about "Juggling Knitting with Football." He swears that it got him into UCLA. During World War I the Red Cross put out an urgent call for knitted goods. They taught BOYS and girls to knit. I found this from May 1918 the Seattle School Bulletin printed this patriotic knitting song:

Johnnie, get your yarn, get your yarn, get your yarn;
Knitting has a charm, has a charm, has a charm,
See us knitting two by two,
Boys in Seattle like it too.
Hurry every day, don’t delay, make it pay.
Our laddies must be warm, not forlorn mid the storm.
Hear them call from o’re the sea,
‘Make a sweater, please for me.’
Over here everywhere,
We are knitting for the boys over there,
It’s a sock or a sweater, or even better
To do your bit and knit a square.

The song is quoted from this article.
http://www.historylink.org/essays/output.cfm?file_id=5721

PS- Wendy Sizzzzzle is so hot, I can't wait to give it a try!

[katie]

wendy - I just have to tell you that my mother is a third grade teacher, as well as an amazing knitter. About 4 years ago she started a knitting group in her school, and she has LOTS of boys (as well as girls). And as far as I know, no parents have made an issue of it.. So there is hope!

[Risa]

Sizzle is next in my knitting queue as well. I picked up some Cascade Sierra last night for it. Love your patterns!

As for boys knitting? There's some current stereotype that declares that any of the more feminine of pasttimes just isn't appropriate for boys. Not going to stop me from teaching my son to knit while I teach my daughter.

[Katie]

I consider knitting and sewing life lessons, I wouldn't deny that from my boys any more than I wouldn't teach my girls how to use a power drill. (Love my cordless power drill, hehe)

And I wish that I could come up with a witty comeback for those moms but even after several minutes, I'm still thinking, "huh?"

[Jenny]

Well, since everyone else has covered the 'boys can't knit' topic, I'll comment on the AC. I have one of those too. I was all excited about getting it until I saw that ridiculous dryer hose contraption that I had to stick out of my window. I had to buy drapes to cover that sucker. But I'm loving the nice cool room.

[Allison]

One more on the boys and knitting topic. Reading this makes me sad - I mean, really. It's 2006! I am quite crafty and my husband is very athletic. I've talked about this with my husband, as how to approach it if our forthcoming son wants to be crafty instead of sporty, or do a bit of both. We agreed that whatever he wants to do is fine by us. I'm sure we'll sign him up for ice hockey as soon as we can, but if he doesn't like it, that's OK. He can try something else if he wants. My mother is a potter and I plan on exposing him to afternoons of clay with Nannie, where he can make, pound and mold whatever his little heart desires. In addition to teamwork, creativity is a skill that all people need to survive and thrive in this world!

In general, I cannot believe any mother would discourage their son from any type of hobby that is constructive and brings them happiness. They will be better adjusted men as adults when they know their parents support their passions.

[shannon]

Let me tell you what. I have 5 children and all of them, even and especially the boys will knit and crochet. I have already warned my husband. I can't even get started on how this was a man's art first or how if more men knit there would be less war. Errr, it just makes me mad.

and by the way, I have an 11 year old girl that plays boy's lacrosse, has a mohawk and blue hair because frankly, if this is how she wants to express herself then that's fine with me. She is not hurting anyone and if she doesn't care what other people have to say about her style why should I?