Man-Rules and a Free Pattern

Some days I wonder how men can get away with spending so much time in the bathroom.

Us girls, well, we're in there for however long it takes, and that however long it takes is typically 20 minutes fewer than the man's version of however long it takes.

So I'm wondering if I should start taking my knitting to the bathroom with me? I suppose the man-rules won't apply to me, so I won't have a never-ending allotment of bathroom time. I can only imagine that I'll be reported and someone would call the authorities or the the police, child protective services or maybe the paramedics if I spend more than, say, one-half minute in that little room.

Back in the day when I worked in a big corporation (the little corporations I worked for apply to this, too), the guys thought nothing of rolling up a newspaper or magazine and sauntering over to the little room. Decades would pass before they alighted. Calls would come in and we'd all know that they were currently "indisposed" (reading or maybe just sitting there or passing the time) and that the call would have to be returned later. Same goes for fire drill.

Why is it the other sex has this "I have to go now" privilege? Would I be in trouble if I took my "I have to go now time and knit?" If I did, wouldn't it be a hoot?

Better get a cushy toilet seat cover, or maybe knit one for myself. (Actually I was thinking about designing one for laughs.) Oy. Of all the things.

Oh, here's the Alchemy Bamboo swatch that I kept knitting and knitting and knitting. Once I got to about 49 inches I decided the swatch was a head wrap thing. So take a look at the sidebar, Free Patterns. It's there for you, should you decide you have one skein of something wonderful. I'm calling it Dream Swatch. Because it is.

Comments

[insaknitty]

I have a friend who likes to spend time in the bathroom... she used to use that time to read and write letters. and knit christmas gifts. which kind of grosses me out, but also makes me laugh. I guess that's one place you know no one is gonna bug you!

[lisaz]

Well, I think that bathroom knitting is a good thing (I have been known to take mine in on occasion - the boyfriend just gives a knowing look) - but best of all, if you are at work, it's impolite to ask what you were doing all that time. So, if anyone DID ask - you can just say - I was in the WC - that SHOULD stop the questions right there.

[danielle]

Wendy, i really love your blog. you've got such great style! the bamboo yarn you used looks just like some koigu kpppm that i have left over in yellow/green/blue. i'm having delightful visions of a super-skinny sockweight version of your headband.......
thanks for being so inspiring!

[Gina]

I am amazed by the utter lack of embarassment that men display -- "I'm bringing in Newsweek while I poop". Bizarre.
Thank you for the pattern!

[Charity]

My own Girlfriend and I have been reading the Ramona books by Beverly Cleary - there's a Grandma who knits that my Girl thinks is hilarious! The ladies in those books head to the bathroom any time they need to have a cry! I think I might try it the next time I feel the need for a good weep.

Thanks for the pattern, I'm looking forward to giving it a try!

[jj]

eeew! A knit toilet cover would be gross.

[Erica]

Oh, yes, I hear you on the man rules. We have wireless Internet connection at our house, so Hubby takes his LAPTOP in there!!!! Thing is, we only have one bathroom in our house, so this can be a problem with three females, two of them under four feet tall. We get our share of "Hurry, Daddy! I'm going to have a pee-pee accident!"

LOVE the extended swatch!

[taryn]

that headband is GORGEOUS. that's shot itself to the top of the next to make list, i love it.

[jillian]

Pretty scarf/belt/headwrap!

Funny story :) So true.

[Stephanie]

I so understand this dilemma with the men. I've got 4 here in my house! I don't understand the fascination of the 30 minute bathroom break and 2 - 3 times a day at that! Love the pattern!

[keohinani]

haha...dream swatch. i have something like that. i was trying to reproduce something i saw on a sweater at the mall, and i was doing great until i put it down. i forgot what i was doing...too bad i didn't take notes on that one. it's not large or small enough to be anything, and it's got some mohair so i really don't want to rip it out. gah.

[heather]

Your swatch is really cute as a head wrap. You look good in everything!
I'm also having heart palps over your silver cuff/bangle thing.
I ask any man I meet about the bathroom thing, why they need the mag or book. I never get a satisfactory answer. We'll never know.....

[Wanett]

The only time I Knit in the bathroom is while my Missy is in the tub. She needs to play with 40 dolls and I lack the patience to wait without something to do. Missy noticed this and asked where was my knitting last week when I didn't have it. I read while she plays sometimes too. I am with the men on the bathroom reading thing, I do find that I am sitting there reading when I could just go to the couch, but then somebody would want to talk or ask for juice or cry to be held, so I have my reasons for hiding out in there. = )

[Lee-Fay]

That pattern is beautiful - thank you! I bought 1 80 gm skein of multicoloured handspun from a market and haven't been able to find a pattern that will show it off properly. Now I have.

[Desiree]

Thanks so much for the pattern! I so was enamored with it when you showed the pic on the green pursed that I reverse engineered it; except that I used a size 35 needle for the long loop row (along with 10s) instead of doing three wraps. I _knew_ I could do it the wrappy way, but it made the gals at SnB look at me funny when I pulled out 1 big needle. I like to make 'em laugh!
Thanks again.

[Smuddpie]

Love it, Wendy. I call these little projects skill builders. Just enough to try out something new, yet not just a swatch. I've done the wraps, but not crossed them over. I love the blue and green, but lately I'm crazy for green and pink!

As for the reading room, all I have to say is... library books. Gotta love Amazon.

[Katie]

The yarn is gorgeous! And I don't remember the last time I actually used the bathroom by myself, let alone cherish the time or anything.

[Ariane]

I love the patter, Wendy, super cute! I should be done with mine today.

[Rhonda]

I love the headband ... know just the skein I've be saving for something like this. Thanks!!

P.s. you're better off knitting in a closet (with a little clip on light over your head & pillows in the back to lean on) than you are in the bathroom. They always go looking for you & the 1st place they look is the "bathroom." Hey, how do I know that?

[Rhonda]

I love the headband ... know just the skein I've be saving for something like this. Thanks!!

P.s. you're better off knitting in a closet (with a little clip on light over your head & pillows in the back to lean on) than you are in the bathroom. They always go looking for you & the 1st place they look is the "bathroom." Hey, how do I know that?

[WendyI]

Since I live in a houseful of men, the bathroom seems to be the only place where a girl can get a minute's peace. So yes, I've been known to sneak knitting in. Also, a long soak in the tub is a great place to start toe-up sock ... just enough time to do those short rows!

[Abbie]

I love your swatch! It looks beautiful in your hair.

Thanks for the pattern!

BTW, my cat spends far more time in the bathroom than my husband does. And the other day we had friends over and the cat decided we didn't have enough fragrance in the air...it was so bad it really was embarrasing! Just thought you might like to know that some cats have a monopoly on bathroom time...

[Rhonda]

Thanks for the great pattern! I've been losing my patience while growing my hair out, and that head wrap is just the thing to keep my hair occupied before I try to cut it all off!
And what is up with the manly claim on bathroom time? The throne is, after all, just a figure of speech!

[Ruinwen]

Love the swatch! Of, course you look fab in it!

Thanks for the pattern. I have some Maggi Knits that someone sent me and I didn't know what to do with it...this will be perfect!

Ruinwen
:)

[Mandy]

That's adorable. And such a great idea for that beautiful yarn you can't afford to buy more of. Totally making one.